So Fortunate


Today I went to work again.  It was only my 4th full day of work since I started my maternity leave in early August of 2014 (i.e. over one year ago).  Amazing.

Today I thought about how very fortunate I am.

Before my baby’s birth, I was hoping that our new family of 3 would be able to live on one income (plus a good bit of savings) so that I could stay home for at least 6 months, if not longer.

At the time, the only deciding factor was money.

But– I obviously had NO way of anticipating just how debilitated I’d feel for sooo many months after my (horrific) childbirth.

It would have been COMPLETELY IMPOSSIBLE for me to go back to work at 3 months post-partum.  It would have been HORRIBLE to imagine trying to work at 6 months post-partum.  And, even at 9 months post-partum (!), I was not at all physically capable of performing my job…even on a PRN (as needed) basis.

That’s the truth!

Even at 1 year post-partum, I didn’t feel 100% ready.  Yet, I was eager to find out if I could “tolerate” working just a little bit.  I started putting the wheels in motion…

I returned to work in September 2015, just before my baby turned 13 months old.  (I planned to work just ~1 day per week.)  If you recall, I had a decent first day back.  But…I cried the next day.

Now my boy is 14 months old (time is really ticking).  Another month has passed.

Today I was able to perform my job just fine.  Things aren’t perfect.  I’m not feeling “normal.”  But I can work!

I’m so lucky that I had the luxury of being able to stay home for as long as I wanted to.  I was able to take care of my baby AND take care of myself in that year.  Despite my struggles, in many ways it was a peaceful year.  Things could have been so much worse!

Every day I have a lot to be thankful for.  I don’t ever forget it.

I am healed.


2 thoughts on “So Fortunate

  1. I love your blog. It is helpful to me. I feel encouraged and uplifted when I read here and see that others are reading, too. I am going through this myself as well.


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